You wanted magic items, but here are some glass dildos instead #BushesAreDumb - May 15, 2020
- Tornado watch?
- Everyone wakes up to a beautiful sunny day, and it's time for breakfast.
- A city guard approaches the group to deliver an invitation to a meeting with Alejandro.
- They agree to come as soon as they finish eating breakfast.
- At the very beginning of the meeting in response to how did you sleep, Acta drops the bomb about her screaming nightmare.
- That's when they notice Acta's new amulet.
- There is a collective facepalm.
- Alejandro recognizes the material in the cracks as brain matter.
- Alejandro called them to discuss Agrexost
- He would like ideas on how to track down the lost titan.
- Acta asks for a reward, of course.
- He agrees to arrange for Sariel to have a focus object to be able to scry for Agrexost and Ellilune
- Torin Denholm is a person Alejandro says might be able to help them
- He is a half-elven wizard with whose help Alejandro discovered Agrexost and founded the city
- They have fallen out since then, and now Torin lives in the mountains somewhere in the Cottlenia Highlands, and he can portal them to the vicinity
- Torin's magical specialty is divination, and he is particularly good at finding irregularities in the underpinnings of things.
- Zaril has heard he is known to be eccentric and anti-social.
- Sariel asks Alejandro if one of their personalities would be the best to approach the wizard, and they are told that Torin values intelligence and scholarship, and wishes to understand the structure of how magic works.
- Torin and Alejandro fell out over how the titan would be treated when they started mining its brain matter.
- Alejandro also agrees to provide a small sample of the brain ore to use in scrying the creature.
- They all agree to spend the day preparing and leave the next morning.
- Zaril immediately goes to the mine to collect samples of the vines for use in scrying.
- All the vines that are there are dead-looking, but she hacks away at them and collects a bit.
- Sariel heads that direction as well to check in the little park area she built and to see if the air elemental has come back.
- Zaril sees that there are quite a few footprints, which are probably some of the more intrepid locals have come to check out the area.
- Neil goes to see Sarah again and tell her the next steps in keeping the city safe.
- Sarah is in the wardroom when he arrives.
- They arrange to see each other that evening.
- On the way out, he stops by the armory to see if they can spare weapons and ammunition for his quiver.
- Sariel and Zaril head to the Glass Codex to pick up the scrying focus, which is in a moderately sized box and has a bit of weight to it.
- Nestled in the box amongst wool padding is a crystalline sphere (6" diameter), and four oblong objects arranged around the central object. Zaril snatches up on of the objects and opens it, and it is a glass dildo covered in leaves and vines. Zaril quickly packs it back up and thrusts it back into the box also noticing a smaller package in the bottom too.
- The girls head from there to see Sgt Watson so that Zaril can ask Watson for a better weapon, Watson manages to dig her up a Vicious Rapier +1.
- Sgt Watson won't take the dildos and tells Sariel that if she knows where her parts are she can figure out how to use it.
- Zaril has an idea, so they head back to the mine area.
- Zaril takes the dildo intended for her (covered with musical symbols) and casts Shatter on it.
- She then uses the larger, less jagged pieces to make herself a necklace.
- They return to the inn, and give out the "presents" from the glass shop.
- Luca has no idea what she just received. It looks like a practice sword in that it's long and tapers and the other end looks like a hilt.
- Acta just shrugs and sticks hers into her bag of holding. Hers looks like what one imagines a dragon penis would look like. Whatever that means.
- Neil gets a butt plug with a crown on the base.
- They put their things away and head to the library.
- They ask Ezra about Torin.
- He is mentioned in some of the histories of the city.
- The Cottlenia Highlands is in the same mountain range as the civilization Zaril hails from.
- Ezra remembers Torin, and remembers that he enjoys almond cookies.
- Zaril sits down to read the book, but there's nothing in it that Alejandro didn't already tell them.
- Ezra is going to send a packet of her cookies to them in the morning.
- They all have drinks in the bar, first round on the house.
- Neil inquires after the special blend.
- The shots are a light blue and effervescent with a mildly fruity taste. It's a distilled fairy concoction and magical essence.
- After, Acta orders a glass of the strongest wine he's got.
- As they are drinking and relaxing, Watson appears and sits down with them for a little while.
- Sariel, Zaril, and Luca drag Acta to a different table.
- She huffs out the back door to the inn's garden and plants one of her magic beans in an open spot.
- An animate stone statue in Acta's likeness appears and starts insulting, cursing, and threatening her.
- Sariel, Zaril, and Luca hears something and go outside to investigate.
- Neil is at the bar with Sarah saying, "They're probably fine."
- Acta asks Luca to smash the statue so it won't send people after her to kill her.
- Luca swings her mace into the statue's face and damages the nose and eyes, but the mouth keeps insulting Acta.
- People are starting to come out of the inn have come outside to see what's going on. Not Neil.
- Sariel assures everyone that the statue is merely a magic spell gone wrong, and that she trusts Acta with her life - No comment about Acta being a thieving wench, because there's no denying that she'll take anything that isn't nailed down.
- Luca hits it again and knocks the head off.
- Acta rolls the head into the bag of holding. The arms of the statue are still gesticulating wildly like it's still shouting, but you can't hear anything any more.
- As the girls are coming back inside, Sarah and Neil head upstairs.
- Much flirting ensues before the screen fades to black.
- Zaril Sends to her mentor to ask if he knows where Torin Denholm lives, and that person responds that that area is extremely dangerous and he would be surprised to hear that anyone lives there.
- The next morning, the group finds a package waiting for them from Ezra that seems to contain 50 almond butter cookies.
- They are delicious and sweet and flaky.
- They head over to the barracks to portal to the dangerous mountain to search for a wizard.
- They exit the portal in very rocky terrain about half-way up a mountain. The only vegetation is dry, scrubby bushes and grass. Everything is very dusty.
- Zaril flies up to scout, and realizes that they are on a kind of path.
- Neil looks around and finds some animal tracks. Mostly small critters, but also some strange larger tracks that look bipedal, but not humanoid.
- Sariel finds the largest bush in sight and casts Speak with Plants on it. After a very frustrating conversation (apparently bushes aren't as smart as trees) and some water from her water skein, she learns nothing useful. She gives it another handful of water from her skein anyway, and the group heads up the mountain.
- 3,000 XP ea. for a total of 99,400 XP total ea.
- Everyone wakes up to a beautiful sunny day, and it's time for breakfast.
- A city guard approaches the group to deliver an invitation to a meeting with Alejandro.
- They agree to come as soon as they finish eating breakfast.
- At the very beginning of the meeting in response to how did you sleep, Acta drops the bomb about her screaming nightmare.
- That's when they notice Acta's new amulet.
- There is a collective facepalm.
- Alejandro recognizes the material in the cracks as brain matter.
- Alejandro called them to discuss Agrexost
- He would like ideas on how to track down the lost titan.
- Acta asks for a reward, of course.
- He agrees to arrange for Sariel to have a focus object to be able to scry for Agrexost and Ellilune
- Torin Denholm is a person Alejandro says might be able to help them
- He is a half-elven wizard with whose help Alejandro discovered Agrexost and founded the city
- They have fallen out since then, and now Torin lives in the mountains somewhere in the Cottlenia Highlands, and he can portal them to the vicinity
- Torin's magical specialty is divination, and he is particularly good at finding irregularities in the underpinnings of things.
- Zaril has heard he is known to be eccentric and anti-social.
- Sariel asks Alejandro if one of their personalities would be the best to approach the wizard, and they are told that Torin values intelligence and scholarship, and wishes to understand the structure of how magic works.
- Torin and Alejandro fell out over how the titan would be treated when they started mining its brain matter.
- Alejandro also agrees to provide a small sample of the brain ore to use in scrying the creature.
- They all agree to spend the day preparing and leave the next morning.
- Zaril immediately goes to the mine to collect samples of the vines for use in scrying.
- All the vines that are there are dead-looking, but she hacks away at them and collects a bit.
- Sariel heads that direction as well to check in the little park area she built and to see if the air elemental has come back.
- Zaril sees that there are quite a few footprints, which are probably some of the more intrepid locals have come to check out the area.
- Neil goes to see Sarah again and tell her the next steps in keeping the city safe.
- Sarah is in the wardroom when he arrives.
- They arrange to see each other that evening.
- On the way out, he stops by the armory to see if they can spare weapons and ammunition for his quiver.
- Sariel and Zaril head to the Glass Codex to pick up the scrying focus, which is in a moderately sized box and has a bit of weight to it.
- Nestled in the box amongst wool padding is a crystalline sphere (6" diameter), and four oblong objects arranged around the central object. Zaril snatches up on of the objects and opens it, and it is a glass dildo covered in leaves and vines. Zaril quickly packs it back up and thrusts it back into the box also noticing a smaller package in the bottom too.
- The girls head from there to see Sgt Watson so that Zaril can ask Watson for a better weapon, Watson manages to dig her up a Vicious Rapier +1.
- Sgt Watson won't take the dildos and tells Sariel that if she knows where her parts are she can figure out how to use it.
- Zaril has an idea, so they head back to the mine area.
- Zaril takes the dildo intended for her (covered with musical symbols) and casts Shatter on it.
- She then uses the larger, less jagged pieces to make herself a necklace.
- They return to the inn, and give out the "presents" from the glass shop.
- Luca has no idea what she just received. It looks like a practice sword in that it's long and tapers and the other end looks like a hilt.
- Acta just shrugs and sticks hers into her bag of holding. Hers looks like what one imagines a dragon penis would look like. Whatever that means.
- Neil gets a butt plug with a crown on the base.
- They put their things away and head to the library.
- They ask Ezra about Torin.
- He is mentioned in some of the histories of the city.
- The Cottlenia Highlands is in the same mountain range as the civilization Zaril hails from.
- Ezra remembers Torin, and remembers that he enjoys almond cookies.
- Zaril sits down to read the book, but there's nothing in it that Alejandro didn't already tell them.
- Ezra is going to send a packet of her cookies to them in the morning.
- They all have drinks in the bar, first round on the house.
- Neil inquires after the special blend.
- The shots are a light blue and effervescent with a mildly fruity taste. It's a distilled fairy concoction and magical essence.
- After, Acta orders a glass of the strongest wine he's got.
- As they are drinking and relaxing, Watson appears and sits down with them for a little while.
- Sariel, Zaril, and Luca drag Acta to a different table.
- She huffs out the back door to the inn's garden and plants one of her magic beans in an open spot.
- An animate stone statue in Acta's likeness appears and starts insulting, cursing, and threatening her.
- Sariel, Zaril, and Luca hears something and go outside to investigate.
- Neil is at the bar with Sarah saying, "They're probably fine."
- Acta asks Luca to smash the statue so it won't send people after her to kill her.
- Luca swings her mace into the statue's face and damages the nose and eyes, but the mouth keeps insulting Acta.
- People are starting to come out of the inn have come outside to see what's going on. Not Neil.
- Sariel assures everyone that the statue is merely a magic spell gone wrong, and that she trusts Acta with her life - No comment about Acta being a thieving wench, because there's no denying that she'll take anything that isn't nailed down.
- Luca hits it again and knocks the head off.
- Acta rolls the head into the bag of holding. The arms of the statue are still gesticulating wildly like it's still shouting, but you can't hear anything any more.
- As the girls are coming back inside, Sarah and Neil head upstairs.
- Much flirting ensues before the screen fades to black.
- Zaril Sends to her mentor to ask if he knows where Torin Denholm lives, and that person responds that that area is extremely dangerous and he would be surprised to hear that anyone lives there.
- The next morning, the group finds a package waiting for them from Ezra that seems to contain 50 almond butter cookies.
- They are delicious and sweet and flaky.
- They head over to the barracks to portal to the dangerous mountain to search for a wizard.
- They exit the portal in very rocky terrain about half-way up a mountain. The only vegetation is dry, scrubby bushes and grass. Everything is very dusty.
- Zaril flies up to scout, and realizes that they are on a kind of path.
- Neil looks around and finds some animal tracks. Mostly small critters, but also some strange larger tracks that look bipedal, but not humanoid.
- Sariel finds the largest bush in sight and casts Speak with Plants on it. After a very frustrating conversation (apparently bushes aren't as smart as trees) and some water from her water skein, she learns nothing useful. She gives it another handful of water from her skein anyway, and the group heads up the mountain.
- 3,000 XP ea. for a total of 99,400 XP total ea.
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